"I against I" OR "Defeating Kristian as Kristian"

You may recall that at the beginning of the year I laid out several goals that I wanted to accomplish each month. I must say that January was a very successful month, but February was very different, my goal-accomplishing skills were much "less effective." Thinking back I see my main mistake was not starting the month with any specific goals in mind. And without any concrete aspirations, it is nearly impossible to accomplish anything.

There are several reasons I am trying to challenge myself. For one, I really want to become a better person, and I feel like I have been much too stagnant for the past year. And two, I like a good challenge and I feel like if I make a "to do list" every month, I will feel like I am being successful once I accomplish those goals. It's not easy breaking old habits. It's almost like my new self is fighting my old self to the death. Most of my old habits are lingering around, while my new self wants to break through and take over. In a sense, it's just "Old" Kristian vs. "New" Kristian.

"New" Kristian vs. "Old" Kristian

Battle Statistics:

Round 1 (January 2008): Victory to "New" Kristian

Round 2 (February 2008): Victory to "Old" Kristian

Round 3 (March 2008): The final round, TBD

As you can see, the score is even, "old" has defeated "new" and "new" has defeated "old." Next month is a big month, it will truly determine if I really do want to change. I'm hoping for a "New" Kristian victory. If that happens then I am on my way to change. Stay tuned...